danielac.tumblr.com

21st May 2009 @ 2:31

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it's that one word...

It’s scary how so many people go through the same thing and when you’re going through it, you think you’re all alone.

Also, I now realize why all songs are about the same thing.

20th May 2009 @ 22:17

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FML.

20th May 2009 @ 21:35

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because if I don't write it down, I might say it out loud.

So it’s been almost a week since my aunt and cousin arrived to stay with us, and you know, I’m alright, I’m chill, I’m not trying to find anything to complain or anything. You know why? It finds me. Not my fault.

By the looks of my room right now, you’d never guess I really like things to be clean. (I’m just in the middle of organizing my very large bookcase and the boxes I packed at school, ok?) After living with 7 other girls for the last year I just can’t stand mess at home, especially cuz, you know, home is supposed to be clean. But it’s hard since right now my mom is in school full time and working full time. So all of the chores fall on me, my sister, and that other sibling I have to call my half-brother. But my sister is impossibly lazy—shown by her report card— and my brother, well, that’s a lost cause. My dad says it’s because men don’t know how to clean. I refuse to believe that. Because hell will freeze over before I ever get involved/marry a man who can’t fucking clean. Sooo I’m busting my ass, cleaning, and they don’t do jack shit.

Along with the lazy mofos I call my siblings, my aunt and cousin staying don’t really help. Now, I don’t blame my aunt at all because she’s not young and she’s pretty sick and can barely walk. I’m trying my best to make her stay here as easy as possible. Her daughter however can go… I’ll just keep that to myself. She’s not freaking paralyzed, she’s fully able to help out, and does nothing.

The first night they got here, our just cleaned bathroom became a mess because mostly her makeup and remover and lotions were all over the place. Mind you, we JUST cleaned the bathroom. And so a few days later, I emptied out one of the drawers on the sink/vanity in the bathroom so they could put their stuff in there. Yet days later, shit’s still on top of the sink. I don’t get how much more obvious I have to be to get their shit cleaned up.

Now the whole clean thing isn’t even all that’s bothering me. Since my mom is at work late tonight, I decided to cook because I was really sick of ordering in or fast food brought by my mom and dad. Plus, that’s just not healthy. So I made some food (and all this time, my cousin sits on the couch not offering to help or anything), and I tell everyone to come eat. So everyone eats, and I get no words. None. No “thanks you”s, nothing. The only one I got was from my aunt after I went to offer her another croissant. Now mind you, I didn’t exactly do it to get praise or that shit, because I realize it wasn’t that great a dinner (I don’t cook. I just don’t.) but seriously? You’re guests, the least you can say is thanks. I could have easy sat there and eaten some Berry Berry Kix and you could have waited for my parents to get back, but that didn’t happen.

So I’m outside taking some garbage out and my dad comes out to see what I cleaned earlier today (our table and chairs on the deck) and I tell him, and apparently its because my cousin feels like I don’t like her because I don’t talk to her enough or some bullshit like that. And it’s probably because my brother is all fucking over her that she must think that’s normal. He’s just trying to seem like the best nephew while they’re here so my dad won’t send him to Florida for the summer. He wants someone on his side when that day comes, and since they’ll probably still be here when he’s leaving, he wants them on his side. He’s been such a brown noser, I’m surprised my dad hasn’t given him a tissue to clean the shit off his nose yet. Also, I’m sure he’s been telling her I don’t like her or something like that because he hates me. (No seriously, he does. I’m not even going to get into the fights and arguments he starts with me…)

Now I realize it’s never great to talk about your family, and I must seem like the biggest asshole to write all this, but I get frustrated very easily. I don’t need everyone to agree with me, or be a clean freak, or be thanking me for every thing I do, but at least act gracious once in a while, at least wash a dish here and there, that’s all. I just can’t stand people who think they are entitled to everything given to them. Also, if I didn’t write this down, I might just say it and then I’d be in some deep shiz with the famz. So, don’t tell my dad.

18th May 2009 @ 5:06

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you know how I keep saying I don’t want another tattoo? maybe I do? kind of like this but just one or two words.

or maybe I don’t. I don’t know. I’m the world’s most indecisive person ever.